The Sad Man

B"H

With A Loyal Heart

The chasuneh is a personal day of atonement for the couple who stands under the chupah, the marriage canopy.  They fast like a Yom Kippur.  They wear white, like the shrouds that will cover their nakedness on the day of their burial.  And they get a new beginning ... together.  This is how Uncle Yosef and Polina, his Lina, began anew with lightening and fire. 

Bubbe Dana, of blessed memory, loved her Sonia and her baby Lina.  It was an emotion so concentrated and potent that even from the grave she was her Lina's shadchanes (matchmaker).  And what a good job she did.  She picked Yosef who loved the Sabbath and Lina.  In fact, Uncle Yosef was so loyal a soul that only an angel's view could reveal what a gift Bubbe Dana had bestowed upon her girls.  Uncle Yosef took care of his Lina and his mother-in-law.  And the women took good care of him. 

They all lived modestly and humbly together in the back of the storefront where Uncle Yosef was the book-keeper.  Sonia kept the place clean and did the cooking for them all since Lina was having a difficult time with her growing belly.  Sonia thanked G-d daily for the gentleness of Lina's life during these circumstances.  She had never forgotten her own.

Uncle Yosef was a good husband and son and provider.  But his emotional being was most untutored and therefore un-practiced.  When Lina lost their baby, she lost herself.  Yosef himself was at a loss and so he went to work.  Sonia was in shock.  The violence in her life could produce a Lina but the peace of Lina's life could not sustain Lina's baby.  Oh, they were so sad.  Even Bubbe Dana cried from Olam HaBa, her tears pouring from the heavens. 

No one had a mentor, no teacher of the emotional arts.  Bubbe Dana, of blessed memory, had been a fine role model but even she was not the mentor nor teacher nor guide.  She simply embraced everyone in her love and healed their wounds.  With her gone from this world no one remained who knew what to do. 

Thank G-d for Uncle Yosef's loyalty.  It was not enough to heal any of their wounds but by not running away it was enough to give them a peaceful home with food on the table.  Loving Shabbos was enough to give them respite from their pain and despair. 

As much as we keep the Sabbath, so the Sabbath keeps us.