Inherit the Heart

B"H 

Observations and Recommendations

We left family, friends, and places behind us that year.  With no job possibilities on our familiar turf we left town.  Sam's family was livid.  "Tell him you refuse to leave your parents," they commanded me.  "I'm married to him not to them," I told them.  "Tell him you won't go!" their desperation screamed.  "If he goes, I go, and we take the baby, too," I responded. 

Well, Sam and I and our new baby boy left the grasping tumult and landed in a town with a job.  Was it the best job he had ever worked? ... no.  Were his bosses the most honorable folks we had ever known? ... no.  It was a job that Sam elevated again and again by his pure heart, ever growing standards, and  unfailing hard work.  That one year nearly crushed him and by domino effect it bumped me too.  Thank G_d we survived, thank G_d, thank G_d. 

The next year pulled us away from the lion's den.  His new job and our new town embraced us warmly.  We were just beginning to recover from the previous year that had turned Sam ashen and gray.  Our family grew.  We became four thanks to our new baby girl.  Down Syndrome joined our family too.  So, I learned this new city through the eyes of special needs.  Who knew there were so many angels on earth?  But, that is another story. 

Settling into a new place demands a new group of contacts:  synagogue, medical, dental, banking, and more.  I found a family practice group and made an appointment.  A lady doctor interviewed me, no, let's say she interrogated me for two hours while she examined me.  "So, your husband is a boy scout."  "No," I said, "eagle scout, ... he made eagle scout." 
"Anna, I'm using an expression.  Listen, when a man and a woman marry the woman inherits the emotional life of the family.  Okay?  Let's take care of you and we'll get that boy scout of yours in here too." 

A few years passed and we set up a more specific set of doctors.  Even our family practice physician moved on to another group.  With all those changes though, we stayed friends with Dr. Cara.  One day over coffee I reminded Cara about our first meeting and how I was impressed by the notion that someone could inherit the heart of the whole family.  She turned towards me, moved her glasses to the tip of her nose thanks to middle aged eyes, looked over the glasses and then, down at me, "Anna, that was an observation NOT a recommendation." 

Some people see life so clearly but do not understand it.  SOMEONE must inherit the emotional life of the family or we are doomed.  Perhaps it is seen more frequently in the woman and the girl.  But we must also remember there are men and boys who in their own masculine ways have hearts big enough to heal many wounds. 

As 2011, comes to a close we thank G_d for all the healing, renewal, and continued wellness He has bestowed upon us.  May G_d and His gift of this new year 2012, bring the resources to heal, renew, and sustain wellness for us and all those within our reach.

A BLESSED SEASON FOR ALL!