Life Is With People...

B"H, 

The Messenger is the Message...

"Why did you leave the building?  You told me that the building has a salon and barber shop. There is no reason to leave the building if the services you need are already there."

These were my sister's words when she learned that our parents had taken themselves to the JCPenney Salon at the mall.  Our mother had been watching the people who used the salon and barber shop in their new assisted living apartment building.  

"Anna, everyone who goes in there comes out looking the same.  I don't want to look like your father."  

Sounds reasonable to me... I wouldn't want to look like Sam... Actually, I don't think that it is possible... Oy, my big sister... a good soul, a loving soul, a fearful soul...  She would lock our parents in a padded cell to keep them safe forever.  Most folks, however, want their freedom.  

The Shoe Fits...

B"H, 

...But Can You Dance In It?

"They fit.  They are beautiful.  Can you stand in them?  Try walking.  Okay, not bad, you just found your wedding shoes," said my aunt and my mother.

Two days later my dear friend and colleague took a look at my wedding dress and shoes.  "You will never make it through the day in those things," she said pointing at the white silk, embroidered and beaded shoes.  "Get white satin slip-ons.  No one will know the difference but you.  And you will be grateful to me, I guarantee you.  As soon as the ceremony is over and you guys have a few moments of privacy just change shoes.  When you come in for supper you will feel wonderful and comfortable."  And Lisel was right.

I wonder often about the passion that demands everything look right.  Those silk shoes were exquisite.  I could stand in them.  I could even walk in them.  But I could never dance in them with joy and zest.  

Quite Ordinary

B"H

To Write Lives...

What teaches us the best?  A written history with all of the great moments in highlights or a written life with all that is quite ordinary.  The honest, imperfect human... dirty laundry, shame, warts, whatever you call the truth.  

Who teaches us the best?  The one with passion for living, mistakes and successes, and with a desire to connect...

July 12, 1978, Wednesday night

Dear Anna, I am so thrilled to read your letters as they sound so happy, and even your mother is happy, as reading them, she says you radiate happiness in them!  

Thank you!

B"H,  

A Grateful Heart Always

Thank you, everyone, for keeping vigil with me and my written thoughts.  A year has now passed.  A gazillion little notebooks I have filled with my scribble.  What started with great despair has become something else.  What that is, I don't know, but mystery is okay.  Many thanks to my friends who encouraged me to write as a way to prayer and healing.  Many thanks to my husband for making this blog which allows me to share some of my thoughts with people far and wide.  It has been true for me that writing has brought me closer to prayer, blessings, and healing.  

Pummeled Pillar

B"H

Keystone

Go back to the den.

Why are you standing there?

Please sit down.

DON'T GO OUTSIDE WITHOUT YOUR WALKER!

You are in the line of traffic.

Please, stay with the kids in the den.

For a man who has always been a pillar of his family and community it cannot be pleasant to be pushed out of the way while everyone packs, cleans, and moves the stuff of many lives.  What are the emotions that a man like this must feel as all the women in his life start bossing him around as if he knows nothing.  Bossy females, from his beloved wife of over sixty years, to his two middle aged daughters, to his teenage granddaughter with Down Syndrome...prevent him from surveying the changes in the home he provided for his wife and daughters as well as for the extended family of relatives... near and dear, far and dear.  The home of over fifty-eight years is being turned into an empty shell of a building.  The home is always where the people are and now the people, my mother and father, are moving to be near the grandchildren.    

To See the Silence

B"H

The Silence That Speaks

During Shavuos, just before the Torah reading, Sephardi Jews read a marriage contract between G-d and the people.  It really is a marriage contract, a ketubah, and it was written in the sixteenth century by Israel Najara:

On the sixth day of the third month, the Invisible One came forth from Sinai.  The bridegroom, ruler of rulers, prince of princes, said to his beloved (the people) who is beautiful as the moon, as radiant as the sun, as awesome as an army with great banners, "Many days you will be mine and I will be your redeemer.  I will honor, support, and maintain you.  I will be your shelter and refuge in eternal mercy.  I will give you the Torah by which you and your children will live in health and peace and harmony."  

The bridegroom delivered the Torah that is bigger than the earth and broader than the seas.  The bride consented to the covenant and an everlasting agreement was made.  As a dowry, the bride brought a heart that understands, ears that listen, and eyes that see. 

"May the Bridegroom rejoice with the Bride and the bride rejoice with the husband of her youth, while uttering words of praise."  

Needs First...

B"H, 

Wants May Follow...

For better or for worse my teenage son, my young man, knows how to cook.  Not just cooking, but the "ganze megillah"*.  This includes planning the meal (for example, what's the protein, what's the soluble fiber, leafy greens cooked and/or raw, and a carbohydrate with low glycemic index); building the grocery list; doing the shopping; putting away the groceries; preparing the ingredients; and then cooking each dish.  

He sets the table and serves the meal.  At the end of the eating he puts away the leftovers, clears and cleans the table, clears and cleans the kitchen, and then moves on to something called "Command and Conquer Red Alert 3".